


No Homo

by ugandadistrict9



Series: John and Dave's Adventure in Young Love [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Boys Kissing, Fluff, M/M, johndave - Freeform, non-sburb AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-05
Updated: 2013-09-13
Packaged: 2017-12-22 12:06:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/913030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ugandadistrict9/pseuds/ugandadistrict9
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Okay so basically John and Dave have been Internet friends for years and then when they finally meet in real life, stuff happens</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Edit: **ABANDONED**<br/>sorry but I no longer have interest in continuing this story<br/>I wont delete it i guess but don't be expecting a sequel</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prolouge: John's coming over

**Author's Note:**

> Okay thiS is kind of stupid but whatever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So yeah prolougue thingy before John and Dave meet

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB]  
TG: hey john  
EB: oh hey dave  
EB: i was just about to message you!  
TG: oh cool whats up   
EB: i have something important to tell you! :B  
TG: really what is it  
EB: okay  
EB: i'm coming down to texas next week  
EB: and i convinced my dad to let me go see you!  
EB: isnt this exciting dave?   
EB: we'll finally get to see eachother in person!

Your name is Dave Strider and you literally can't handle this you are so fucking excited.  
You and John finally meeting in person after about 10 years of broship?  
Hell fucking yes.

However, you are admittedly a bit nervous about meeting him.  
You've had a brocrush on this kid for YEARS.   
Considering the fact that you've never met in real life, it's really easy to hide it.   
You've always told yourself that you don't have a chance because: 1 you've never actually so much as seen eachother, and 2, he has this stupid 'no homo' thing.  
You've never understood why, but John is really convinced that he's straight.  
You roll your eyes just thinking about him.  
Your phone makes a noise again and you realize that you've been ignoring John.

EB: dave?  
EB: are you there?

You pick up your phone.  
TG: oh sorry man  
TG: i got kind of distracted  
TG: but yeah  
TG: this is a pretty fucking big thing  
EB: i know, dude  
EB: i can barely wait to see you for real!

You smile fondly, and you can feel the blush creeping up your cheeks. You can't wait to see him either

====> 

Your name is John Egbert and you are also really excited. It's only a week now until you get to go to Texas.  
Your dad is explaining to you how it will all happen. He looks stressed and you are concerned.  
"How intent are you on visiting your friend?"  
Your heart skips a beat just thinking about Dave.  
He makes your heart flutter and you're not really sure why. You're sure that it's just you being dumb.  
"I really want to see him." you say, wondering why he's asking.  
"Okay, well, you see son, here's the thing...." your dad sighs. "The flight was changed. Our flight to Texas-" he takes a breath. "-is today."  
Your jaw drops. "What?"  
"I know."  
You now understand why he was so stressed. "But we don't have any kind of hotel reservations or anywhere to stay!"  
"I know." your dad repeats.  
"So it's today? Already? How are we going to find somewhere to stay?"  
"Well, I was thinking that maybe you could stay with Dave."  
Your eyes widen. "Stay with Dave? I'll ask him."  
"Please do. But try to be quick, we have to finish packing so we can head to the airport."  
You nod and head into your room.   
You shake the mouse on your computer and the screen lights up. You open up pesterchum.  
ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 2:04  
EB: dude!  
TG: hey man   
TG: sup  
EB: i have a really urgent question  
TG: god egbert what are you the bearer of important news  
EB: just listen this is serious  
EB: so our flight got cancelled and re-schedualed for today  
EB: and  
EB: we don't have any hotel booked  
TG: today already  
EB: yeah  
EB: but seriously  
EB: i was wondering if i could stay at your place.

\--> Be Dave

You are now Dave Strider and you cannot believe what's happening. John just asked to stay at your place.

TG: dude are you serious  
EB: yes i really need somewhere to stay  
TG: dude im fucking joking   
TG: of course you can stay with me  
TG: ill make room and stuff before you come  
TG: wait what time do you think youll be getting here  
EB: i dunno like 6 or 7ish  
EB: cuz our plane leaves in like an hour which is why this is urgent.  
TG: oh ok sounds good to me   
TG: you better get goin then  
EB: yes, okay thank you! i'll tell my dad that you said i can stay with you  
ectoBiologist ceased pestering turntechGodhead at 2:19

You sigh and lean back in your chair. You figure you should probably let your bro know that John's staying over for like a week. You hope he makes his plane on time.  
You sit there thinking about what he could possibly look like. In your mind the image is of a hottie, but he most likely just looks like a big dork.  
You simply can't wait to see him.  
Then it occurs to you that he is legitly going to be at your house in approxamately four hours.  
You scramble up from your chair and start to tidy up your hellhole of a room a bit.   
After clearing out sone floor space, you go into the kitchen to find your Bro preparing some sort of food in the microwave.  
He turns around to greet you.  
"Hey there lil' man."  
"Hey Bro. So, uh, y'know how John's supposed to be coming up for a visit next week?"  
Bro nods.   
"Well, his flight was moved so now he's coming today. Is it okay if he spends a few nights here?"  
"Yep it's fine." he smiles. "Your boyfriend can stay over for as long as he wants."  
You hope it's not visible that youre blushing. "He's not my boyfriend.... But if all goes well, I might be able to change that." Your mouth curls into a small smirk.  
The microwave beeps and Bro extends a gloved hand pulls out a plate of leftover Chinese food.  
"You hungry?" he asks.  
"Yeah sorta." You didn't have lunch so you're actually starving.  
Bro has another plate in his hand and he puts it in the microwave, presses a few buttons, and passes you the hot plate.  
You bring it over to the table and sit down. It feels good to get some food in your system.  
As you eat, you think about how different everything will be once John is there. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay that was sorta short the next one will be longer


	2. Maybe Slightly Homo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So yeah they get to meet up in this chapter yay and DirkJake gasp yay

You are John Egbert and you're on the plane to go to Dave's house.  
Well, technically you're going to Texas, but Dave is the one that matters here.  
You're excited to see what he looks like and generally just to sleepover with him.  
The plane isn't landing anytime soon, so you put in your headphones and scroll through the selection of movies.  
You are dissapointed to see that they don't have anything of your taste, but in the end you settle for something random, and end up falling asleep in the middle of it.

\---> This is boring. Be Dave.

You are now Dave Strider. You are sitting in your room overthinking everything.  
You're not sure why, but for sone reason you're secretly very nervous about John coming over to stay at your house.  
Rose seems to be goddamn sure she knows why. She wont stop pestering you. The fuckin' therapist.  
Oh look, there she is pestering you again. You roll your eyes and pick up your phone.

tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 4:58  
TG: oh my god  
TG: its rose let me help you with your nonexistent problems lalonde  
TG: well news flash  
TG: i still dont have problems  
TG: and you are not going to touch them because they are in fact not there  
TG: there are no problems here  
TG: not a single problem  
TG: meaning that you cant deal with any shitty made up problems because there are none here  
TT: Calm down, Strider  
TT: I was just trying to be helpful.  
TG: well its not working  
TT: I know.  
TT: I know you probably won't listen to me, but I'm just going to say that no matter what you say, no matter what you think, I know you have a small emotional problem here.   
TT: I just want to say, that even though you won't admit it to anyone, including yourself, I know that you are nervous about meeting John.

"Goddammit." You curse under your breath. Why the fuck must she be so good at digging into people's minds and finding their hidden emotions.

TG: ugh  
TG: fuck you rose  
TG: fuck your deduction skills  
TG: just general fuck and curse to everything around you  
TT: So you've decided to accept my help?

You can just picture the smirk on Rose's face right now.

TG: fuck  
TT: So, I'm taking that as a yes.  
TG: fine  
TG: go ahead and tell me what my problem is  
TG: just go ahead  
TG: to be honest im not even sure what it is  
TG: so   
TT: It's not a huge deal or anything, Dave. You just have an obvious crush on John, and I'm trying to stop you from worrying so much.   
TT: I know it's affecting you, and getting way into your head, but just don't let it, okay?  
TT: Face your problem upfront.  
TT: And no, by that I do not mean that you should confess your love for him right away, I only mean that you should try to rest easy about it.  
TG: i understand what you mean  
TG: but that doesnt change how nervous i still am  
TG: its just  
TG: what if he doesnt like me back  
TT: Dave, you're overthinking this way too much. Just act like he's your best friend coming over, and don't be so awkward about it.  
TT: If you keep on good terms as best bros, you'll know when the time is right to tell him how you feel.  
TG: ....  
TG: thanks rose  
TG: i guess i kinda did need your help  
TG: anyways i appreciate it  
TT: You're welcome. 

You lean back in your chair.   
Maybe that wasn't so hard.  
You just can't stand how easily she breaks down your emotions and finds out about problems that you weren't even aware you had.  
You're thankful for it too though. She helps you sort out your emotions like a true therapist.

TT: Also, don't worry much about whether or not John likes you back.  
TT: He'll never hate you, ever. 

You smile a little.

TG: thanks lalonde   
TT: No problem, Strider. You are my brother after all.  
TT: Got to help a brother out.  
tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 5:30

You sit up, thinking about what Rose said.   
"John will never hate me...." you mumble to yourself. "Ever."  
With newfound confidence, you look over at the time.   
It's 5:31. John is supposed to get there around 6, you recall.  
You stand up and look around your room. It looks clean enough, you think.  
There's an extra matress on the floor for John to sleep on.  
You smile and go into the living room.  
You go into the kitchen to find it empty. Your Bro isn't even in the house, as usual.  
You figure you should prepare some sort of dinner for when John arrives.  
You would totally bake him a cake, but you know that he hates baked goods.  
You pull some stuff out of the cupboards and start to make some special nachos.

\---> Be John

You are now John Egbert and you have just woken up from your nap.  
You stretch with much difficulty, for there is a man sitting next to you.  
You rub your eyes and put on your glasses. You look down at your watch.   
It's 5:53 and holy shit it's almost 6!!  
That means the plane is landing in Texas really soon!   
Just then, as if on cue, the intercom sounds, announcing that the plane is about to land.  
You smile. You're going to be with Dave in under an hour.  
You try imagine what he looks like. You picture him with dirty blonde hair, and chestnut brown eyes. You think he's probably pretty tall.  
You think about Dave until your thoughts are interrupted by the plane landing.   
Once it stops moving, you pick up your carry on and get off. You reunite with your dad in the airport.   
"Hey, son!" he greets enthousiastically. "How was the flight?"  
"It was good." you reply. "I slept most of the way."  
Dad nods, picking up his bag. "You ready to go call a cab? We've got to get you to your friend's house."  
It just occurs to you now that your dad mentioned nothing about him staying at the Striders'.  
"Wait, Dad, where are you staying then?"  
"I'll find somewhere to stay. Don't worry."  
Your eyes widen. "Can't you stay at Dave's house too?"  
"I don't want to be a burdon. They have a small enough space to begin with."  
"But Dad-"  
"It'll be fine, John. And besides, I have all sorts of meetings to go to. Remember why we came here in the first place? I'm sure you'll be better off without me at your friend's house."  
Oh right. You had forgotten.  
The reason why you had to go to Texas in the first place was for your dad's work.   
He was going to leave you at home, but because Dave lives in the same town as where most of the meetings take place, you convinced him to let you go with him.  
"Yes... I'll be fine with the Striders, I'm just worried that you won't find a good place to stay."  
"It'll all work out." he says calmly. "Now let's go, we've got to catch a cab."  
You pick up your bags and follow your dad outside.  
He calls for a taxi, and you both get inside. He says something to the driver but you're not really listening. You're way too excited. You are a few minutes away from meeting your best bro.  
After about 20 minutes of driving, the car pulls up next to an apartment building.  
Your dad pays the driver and you both step out. The cab drives away, and you look up at the building.  
You have the apartment number in your pocket, and you pull it out. You are literally about to burst with excitement. Your dad follows you up the stairs and you look at all the doors.  
You find the one that matches the scribbled number in your pocket, and find yourself standing in front of Dave's apartment.  
You wonder if he's as pumped about this as you are.  
You knock on the door.  
It slowly opens, and you find yourself staring up a tall blonde boy, with sunglasses on his face. He has cute freckles dotting his cheeks.  
You see his jaw drop as he recognizes you. "John?" he says. You can tell he has a very slight Texan accent.  
"Dave!" You exclaim.  
He throws his arms around you, ensnaring you in the word's longest brohug.  
"You're so adorably small, oh my god." Dave sounds delighted as he ruffles his hand through your hair. "So soft..." he whispers.  
You giggle. "You're so tall, Dave."  
"I can't even believe that this is happening, bro."  
"I know right! It's so great to, er, hug you."  
Dave chuckles and finally lets go of you. "This is great, man."  
He then looks over to your dad.  
Dad nods. "Hello, you must be Dave."  
Dave nods. "Yep, that's me."   
"So where is your parent, Dave?"  
"Oh, I live with my brother. He's not here right now. He went out."  
"Went out where?" Dad asks.  
"I dunno. Probably at his boyfriend's place."  
Your dad raises an eyebrow. "Okay.... I was just wondering, because I'm leaving John here, and I was making sure he's in good hands."  
"Oh, don't worry, Bro's practically never here anyways. We'll be fine here on our own."  
"Are you sure?" your dad gives you a concerned look.   
"Yeah dad, we'll be okay."  
He nods. "Okay."  
"I have some food here, so you don't have to worry about him being hungry." Dave adds.  
Your dad nods and pats you on the head. "Behave yourself." is what he says.  
"Don't worry, Dad."  
He smiles and heads back outside.  
You look over at Dave.  
He grabs your hand and pulls you inside, closing the door behind you.  
He grabs onto your other hand, your fingers interlocking. He starts leaning in closer.  
"Dave what are you doing?" you have no idea what he's doing.  
"Uh, s-sorry..." he lets go of your hands and looks away. He appears to be really embarrassed. "Hey, uh, y-you want some supper?" he quickly changes the subject.  
"Sure....?" you are fairly confused.  
Dave doesn't make eye contact with you the whole time while you eat.   
Or at least, you're pretty sure he doesn't. It's sort of hard to tell when he's wearing shades all the time.  
You can tell he's really embarrassed about what he did. You don't quite understand why, though. You didn't think it was that bad.  
Like, it was kind of gay, and kind of weird, but part of you kind of liked it, in some sort of way that you can't describe.

\----> Be Dave.

You are now Dave Strider and holy shit that was embarrassing. His hands were just so soft and his eyes were just blue and mesmerising and beautiful and perfect and his hair oh god his hair is just black and perfect and soft and he's just so snuggleable and you're just stupid and you couldn't resist him. Just, fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.  
You wanted to listen to Rose's advice. You wanted to keep on good terms with John. You really did.  
You just can be really irrational and stupid sometimes. In fact, you're being irrational and stupid right now.   
Ugh you hate yourself.  
You just can't stand the awkward silence between you two. You pray for something to come to your rescue.  
Just then you hear the door open, and standing there is your Bro, and his boyfriend Jake.   
Jake is a tall, dark-haired brit who wears glasses and the same green jacket all the time.   
He's pretty nice, you suppose.   
He treats your Bro really sweetly. Bro and Jake have the kind of relationship that you wish you and John could have. They're really in love and they kiss and hug and insult eachother and hold hands and blush and sometimes they get in like cute tickle fights and stuff. Also you're pretty sure they fuck eachother senseless when no one's around.  
They enter the kitchen, interrupting the silence surrounding you and John.  
Your Bro looks exceptionally happy. He always does when he's with Jake. That's one of the bigggest reasons you have to like Jake. He makes your Bro more happy than anything in the world.  
"Nachos? Good, I'm starving." Bro says, interrupting your thoughts as he sits down next to you.  
Jake sort of stands there, unsure of where to sit.  
Bro gestures for him to come closer and tells him to sit on his lap.  
Jake blushes slightly, then sits on his lap without hesitation. Bro smiles and kisses Jake on the cheek.

\----> Be John.  
You are John Egbert and you are surprised to see that Dave's Bro has a boyfriend.  
You look over at Dave questioningly.  
He nods and turns to his Bro. "Bro!" he says and gestures to you.  
"Mm, sorry." he looks over at you. "Hey, kid. I'm Dirk. But, Dave an' his friends just call me Bro."  
"And my name's Jake. People normally call me 'Dirk's boyfriend' but that's quite upsetting because I have a name too." says his boyfriend. He has a British accent.  
You nod. "That's okay, Jake. It's nice to meet you both."   
"It's a pleasure to meet you too, John."  
After you all eat, Jake and Dirk go into the living room area and cuddle up on the couch watching a movie. You've always wanted someone to cuddle with while watching movies, so you're sort of jealous.   
But it's okay you suppose. You've just never met the right person, is all. You used to cuddle with your older sister Jane when you two were younger, but she moved out a few years ago to go work for Crocker Corp. You miss her.  
You and Dave go to his room. You sit and watch one of your movies.   
You talk and he insults your taste in movies and you laugh, but you just wish you had someone to cuddle with. You long for the emptiness to be sealed, but it never is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow that was WAY longer than I planned for it to be


	3. Dave, your homo is showing.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some fluff for you beautiful people

Your name is Dave Strider and you're just waking up from your first night with John.  
You wake up to find him sleeping, his head resting on your shoulder, his one hand pinching your sleeve. You figure you both must've fallen asleep during one of the movies.   
You look down at John. He looks adorable when he's sleeping. So adorable, that you just want to kiss his face.  
But you will resist the urge.  
Instead, you let him fall into your arms, hugging him. He's just so cute and small and huggable.   
You keep him wrapped in your arms, (practically sitting on your lap) for a while. He stirs slightly, but doesn't wake up. Once you are sure he's fully asleep, you lean down to his face.  
You quickly kiss him on the cheek, then pull your head back up.  
"Yes!" you whisper to yourself in silent victory. It wasn't exactly what you had in mind, but it was still technically a kiss... And it was pretty satisfying. His skin tastes good. You decide that sooner or later you should kiss him for real.   
You smile to yourself.   
You heard a noise from your phone, but you ignore it, because you don't want to move away from practically half-cuddling with John.  
You feel him stirring and you can tell he's waking up for real this time.

\----> Be John.

You are John Egbert and you are just waking up from your first night at Dave's.  
You find yourself on his lap. He's awake and looking back at you.  
You blush and move off of him.  
"Sorry." you say. "Good morning."  
"Morning." he replies.   
You note that he fell asleep with his shades on, for he is still wearing them.  
You reach up to take them off his face, but he pulls away.  
"No." he says.  
"Why not? C'mon dude, I've never seen your eyes."  
"Yeah but..."  
"Why not?"  
Dave looks away. "Well, they're kind of weird looking..." he mumbles.  
"Weird looking?" you raise an eyebrow. "Like, how?"  
"Well..." he says, reaching for his shades. He sighs. "To skip all the explainin', I guess you can take a look."  
He slowly takes them off. He blinks a couple of times to adjust to the light, then turns to you.  
Your eyes widen. "Wow." you breathe. "Beautiful...."  
His eyes are a brilliant red. They are really pretty and cool.  
His facial expression doesn't change as he puts the shades back on. "There. Now you've seen 'em."  
You nod in approval. "They're sick. I think they're awesome."  
You see him smile slightly at that comment.  
"Thanks." he says cooly. You can tell he's happy that you like them.

\---> Be Dave.

You are Dave Strider and you swear you are not blushing. Egbert just complemented your eyes and Gog you hope he can't see you blushing.  
Most people think that your eyes are scary, or weird, or just plain screwed up but John sincerely beleives that they're beautiful.   
You hide your internal fanboying and keep a straight face. You can't have silly complements destroy your coolkid reputation. You know John thinks that you're cool.   
"Hello? Daa~ave?" John waves his hand in front of your face. You blink a few times. Apparently he's been talking to you this whole time and you're just deaf or some shit.  
"Ah, sorry..." you say, slightly embarrassed to have spaced out like that. "Didn't, uh, hear ya there..."  
"I said, I'm getting kinda hungry. What's for breakfast?"  
"I dunno." you shrug. Depends on whether or not Bro and Jake are here."  
"Okay." he responds.  
You rub your eyes and stretch your arms, tucking your shades into your shirt.  
You stand up, yawning. "C'mon." you wave your hand, beckoning for John to follow you.  
The two of you go into the kitchen to find Bro nowhere to be seen.  
"Where do you think they are?" John asks.  
"They either went to Jake's house, or they're in there." you point to Bro's room. "I'll go take a look."  
You open the door to find them both shirtless and passed out in eachother's arms.  
You smile and roll your eyes. You just close the door again and let them be.  
"They're sleeping." you say.  
John nods. "Those two seem to like eachother a whole lot."  
"Yeah. Let's go eat."

\---->

The two of you are halfway through your breakfast when you remember that someone was pestering you.  
You pull it out of your pocket and unlock it, only to find that it's Rose.  
You roll your eyes.  
"What is it?" John asks.  
"Oh, it's just Lalonde pestering me again."  
He understands. Rose is always messing around with other people's emotions. It's never any of her buisness until she decides it is.  
You wonder what she wants with you now.

tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 11:47  
TT: Good morning, Strider.  
TT: How are you?  
TT: Or should I be asking, how's John?  
TG: shut up  
TG: were fine thanks  
TT: Okay.  
TT: What have you two kids been up to?  
TG: dont call us that you know were the same age  
TT: I know. I was just asking.  
TG: nothing really  
TG: we watched shitty movies  
TG: yeah thats p much it  
TT: Alright.  
TT: Just be sure to keep me up to speed.  
TT: I'm very interested in your relationship, you know.

You look over at John. He smiles patiently.

TG: ok thats weird  
TG: but  
TG: just so you know  
TG: um  
TT: Yes?  
TG: if you really are interested  
TG: uh  
TT: Go on.  
TG: would it be safe to share my victory with you  
TG: its kind of a secret dont tell john  
TT: Victory? If it has anything to do with John, then please do go on.  
TT: I believe your secret will be safe with me.  
TG: ok  
TG: so this morning when john was still asleep  
TG: he sort of fell into my arms  
TG: and i may or may not have kissed him a little  
TT: 'May or may not have'?  
TT: Well, which one is it Dave?  
TG: i think you fuckin know  
TT: Mmhm.  
TT: Was it good?

"What are you guys talking about?"  
You quickly look up from your phone to see John getting increasingly more impatient.  
"What's Rose saying?"  
"It's just sibling stuff." you say.  
"What kind of sibling stuff?"  
"Just stuff." you disconnect with Rose and lock your phone. "Not important."  
He raises an eyebrow at you. "Okay..."  
You finish eating without another word.

\---> Be Rose.

You are now Rose Lalonde and you are genuinely amused. Dave isn't very good with his emotions and you love helping him. You are currently pestering him.

TG: ok  
TG: so this morning when john was still asleep  
TG: he sort of fell into my arms  
TG: and i may or may not have kissed him a little

You smirk.

TT: 'May or may not have'?  
TT: Well, which one is it Dave?  
TG: i think you fuckin know

Aw tsundere Dave.

TT: Mmhm.  
TT: Was it good?

You wait a while for a response. He doesn't say anything for a few minutes. You set your laptop for now and focus back on the pile of yarn on your lap. You continue to knit for a minute or two before you hear your pesterchum notification again.  
You look at it.

TT: Was it good?  
turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 11:54

You raise an eyebrow

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 11:54  
turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 11:55

You aren't quite sure what's going on over there. You would ask, but you don't think he would answer.  
You just wait.  
Eventually, your pesterchum flashes again.  
   
turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 11:55  
TG: yes  
turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 11:56

\---> Be John

You are now John Egbert and you wonder what Dave and Rose were talking about. You'd say you assume you'll never know, but that would be lying. Later you're going to break into his phone and find out.  
"So what do you want to do now?" you ask.  
"I dunno." he says. "Maybe go get kicked out of the mall later. I love getting kicked out of places."  
"Wow, really Dave? Getting kicked out of places? Fascinating." you roll your eyes. "We can though. It'll be fun." you smile.  
"Yeah, let's wait for my Bro to wake up."  
"Okay."

\--->

You hear giggling from Dirk's room, and you look at Dave questioningly.  
The soft giggles evolve into loud laughter.   
You raise an eyebrow. "What are they doing?"  
"Probably something stupid. I'll be right back."

\----> Be Dave.

You're Dave yadada ok we know what's going on  
You knock on your Bro's door. "Bro? Jake?"  
You hear a loud thump. You knock one more time and here a choked "Who is it?"  
"It's Dave." you say.   
"C-come in lil' man." the voice is your Bro, choking on laughter.  
You open the door to find Bro laying on the floor, pinned down by Jake. He appears to be tickling him.   
"What are you guys doing?" you sigh.  
"He's tickling me." Bro looks up at you. "Help."  
"Hey! Dirk, you started this!"  
"No I didn't."  
Jake shakes his head, standing up.  
"Noooo..." Bro reaches up at Jake. "Don't leave. It's cold down here...." he gives him a smirk. "Don't make me pin you down."  
Jake smiles, rolling his eyes. He reaches a hand down to meet your Bro's. He helps him stand up.  
"Thanks, Jakey."  
Jake smiles and kisses him.  
You turn around to look at John. "I was right. It was just something stupid."  
You turn back around to face them.  
"So what's for breakfast, bro?"   
"We just had cereal."   
Bro shrugs. "Okay."  
Jake nods at you as they walk by you into the kitchen.

\-----> Be John again jegus you never stay as John

Okay, okay.   
You are now John Egbert.  
You and Dave are sitting with Dirk and Jake while they eat their breakfast.  
Dirk and Jake make idle chat while they eat.  
You and Dave are pretty much silent. Dave is messaging someone under the table.  
You lean over and try to read it over his shoulder. He doesn't notice.  
He's talking to Rose again. You're pretty curious. You read what's on the screen:

TT: Was there an emergency?  
TG: yeah  
TG: well sorta  
TT: What was it?  
TT: (And congradulations on your kiss by the way. Very smooth move Strider)

Kiss? What kiss? You lean in a little closer.

TG: john asked what we were talking about  
TG: (thanks i know right)  
TG: and i kinda didnt want him to know that we were talking about him  
TG: cuz then hed know  
TG: actually its not a good idea to talk about him right now he

Dave looks over at you and practically jumps out of his skin. "Waa-"   
You chuckle nervously. "Uhh, hey Dave."  
"Jesus fucking Christ dude you scared the shit out of me."  
He quickly types a reply to Rose and locks his phone.  
"H-how long have you been sitting there?"  
"Not that long, actually."  
"Oh, um, w-what did you read?"  
"Something about a kiss, and something about you guys talking about me. What kiss? Who did you kiss Dave?"  
"No one. I.... I don't remember a kiss."  
You roll your eyes. "C'mon Dave."  
He stands up. "I'll, uh, answer you in a sec, I just gotta go take a piss." he goes over to the bathroom.  
You raise an eyebrow.  
His phone flashes again. You smirk and quickly pull it over to you.  
Dirk notices and gives you a thumbs up.   
Good thing you know Dave's passcode.  
You type it in and read the message.

tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 12:03  
TT: Oh, I'm sorry to bother you again,  
TT: (I'm assuming you only disconnected because John was there)  
TT: But, I'm slightly curious;  
TT: Did you kiss him on the cheek, or the lips?  
   
What kiss? You are thouroughly confused. You're tempted to ask, but you know Rose won't tell Dave about the kiss because he was there and she wasn't. Also, 'him'? Dave kissed a boy?  
You quickly put the phone back down before Dave comes back.  
As soon as he returns, you ask.  
"So what kiss are you guys talking about? C'mon dude, you can tell me."  
He seems to be pretty defensive about it. "Um..." he sounds distressed, frantic for a response.  
"I won't tell anyone."  
"I know you won't. But..."  
"Is it embarrassing or something? When was it? If you kissed a guy that's okay."  
"Sh-shut up."  
He notices his phone went off and picks it up.  
"Come on dude who did you kiss? You can't hide behind your phone forever."

\----> Be Dave.

You are Dave Strider (just in case that wasn't clear).  
You read what Rose said (the reader already read that we don't have to repeat it do we) and type your reply.

TG: well it was kind of like  
TG: a peck on the cheek  
TG: but  
TG: he tastes good okay  
TT: Does he now?  
TG: yes  
TG: sweet like apple juice  
TT: Very nice.  
TG: oh you have no idea how badly i want to kiss him for real  
TG: maybe makeout a little  
TT: Good on you, Strider.  
TT: Be sure to tell me if you do.  
TG: i will

You look up to see John glaring at you impatiently.

TG: but im gettin off topic i had an actual urgent question  
TG: john was reading over my shoulder  
TG: and he asks what kiss were talking about  
TG: what do i tell him  
TT: Hmm.  
TT: If you lie, he'll find out later on, and he'll be upset that you didn't tell him the truth.  
TT: However, if you tell him now, I am unsure of what will happen.  
TT: If I were you, I would just tell him that you kissed him.  
TT: Don't make such a big deal out of it.  
TG: youre the one making the big deal out of it lalonde   
TG: ill just tell him im gay oh sure cause thats gonna work  
TT: I didn't say you had to.   
TT: It was merely a suggestion.  
TT: You could also lie, however I have no idea what you plan to tell him in that case.  
TG: shut up rose ill just tell him the truth  
TG: fuck  
TG: bye  
turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 12:17

John's still looking at you. "Well?" he asks. "Dude I'm your best bro. You can tell me who it was. I don't really care all that much, I'm just curious because you've been hiding it."  
"Hidin' it? No...."  
"Dave it's obvious you don't want me to know. Just come on."  
"Okay fine. I-it's kind of embarrassing.."  
Your Bro and his boyfriend have already left the room so you have no one to save you.  
"Okay, Dave, I won't laugh."  
"Oh you certainly won't be laughing..." you mutter.  
"What?"  
"Nothing. Okay, I kissed...." 'okay dave this is your chance. you are the star. its you.' you think to yourself.  
You lean in and kiss him quickly. Wow it's even better than you imagined.  
You can see the shocked look on his face while you pull away, blushing faintly.  
"...You."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this about a week ago or longer, and finished editing itwhile I was in penticton visiting my family, but they don't have wifi so I couldn't put it up until now.


	4. 100% homo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots of kisses, and Dad Egbert might not be too happy about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Golly I spent like hours and hours editing this. I wrote it mostly in the middle of the nights at my grandparents' house.

Your name is John Egbert and holy shit Dave just kissed you. You are so shocked. Why did you not expect this? Dave likes you.... It's just so new, but somehow it's not uncomfortable.  
"D-Dave?" you can tell he's more embarrassed than you are.  
"John." he replies. He's blushing.   
"When... Where did that come from?"  
"Um." he starts. "M-my lips, I think." he is just as bewildered as you are.  
"Do you, er, *like* me Dave?" you ask.  
"I-I think..." he says. He sounds unsure.  
"You think you do..?"  
"Okay fine.... I-I'll tell you the truth. I've had this really uncool crush on you since forever. And...." he sighs. "The kiss thing was, when you were sleeping, I kinda might have... Aw fuck who am I kidding.... I kissed you on the cheek while you were sleeping 'cause I'm a fuckin' stalker and because you are really fuckin' adorable and you just-" he lets out an exasperated sigh. "I love you, okay? If it were up to me we'd've been dating or some shit already. Look at all this undying love here man I fuckin' love you. I know I do."  
You don't know what to say. This whole thing has been a lot to take in. You know he's honest, and you dig deep into your mind for an answer. You let out a small gasp at the realisation.  
You like Dave!  
This is finally all making sense to you now. The butterflies in your stomach when you were talking to him, the faint blushing when you woke up in his lap, the emptiness when you sat across from eachother, and this flushed feeling you have now. You LIKE Dave.  
Your eyes widen. "Dave...." you start. "I love you..."  
Without another word, he grabs you and you find yourself kissing him again. It's really great in a really gay way and you can see Dave is really into it.  
You've never kissed anyone before so this is a mixture of exiting and weird.  
Dave pulls back a bit, grinning.  
It's the most expression you've ever seen on him and wow he's got one attractive smile.   
He's obviously stoked that he finally got to kiss you. It feels strange and a bit creepy to think that Dave has been consciously thinking about the fact that he wants to kiss you (and do who knows what else with you) this whole time. You're happy for him, you suppose.  
He leans back in and closes the gap between the two of you again.

\----> Be Dave.

You are Dave Strider and John is letting you kiss him for real oh gog yes  
He's just so cute. He basically bites you with his great big teeth but it's excellent. You were right. He tastes so sweet and his skin is so soft under your fingers.  
He is the most adorable human being alive. He looks sort of like Jake which you now understand why your bro likes him so much.  
John pulls away, wide eyed. "Dave?"  
"Yeah?"  
"I was just thinking. Does this mean we're, like, a thing?"  
"Do you want us to be?"  
"Well, that's why I was asking you... I don't know."  
"Oh." you say. You smile. "In that case, we are officially a 'thing'."  
John smiles his cute dorky smile.  
You run a hand through his hair.  
You have just put your arms around him again when your Bro comes in.  
A large grin forms on his face.  
John blushes brightly.   
"What are you two kids up to?" he's still grinning because he knows the answer and he's proud.  
"Kissin'." you say casually. You lean back in and give John a peck on the nose.   
Bro beckons for you to come with him. "Come 'ere for a sec, lil' man. I wanna talk to you."  
You stand up, leaving John all alone. He looks up at you, worried and embarrassed.  
You blow a kiss at him as you leave. Bro pulls you into the kitchen, still smiling.  
"So what do you want, Bro?"  
"I'm really sorry for interrupting you guys, but, congradulations. I'm so proud of you. So, so, proud. You actually got the kid to like you. Excellent." he pats your head.  
"Thanks. He's so cute... If I didn't get with him I don't know what I'd do."  
"Oh, I know. I was the exact same way with Jake. Well, I didn't kiss him that early.... But yeah basically similar shit. But how good of a kisser is he?"  
"Oh, so good." you sigh just thinking about him. "His cute big teeth and soft skin.... He has the tastiest lips. Mmm. I could kiss him all day..."  
Bro smiles. "Sounds like you two'll have incredible sex one day. That is, assuming you stay together like this for 3 years or so."  
"Uh, yeah."  
"Anyways, I'll let you get back to mackin' on your boyfriend. You two kids go crazy." he winks, leaving the kitchen and retreating back into his room.  
You nod and return to your beloved John. You decide you don't want to do anything today except kiss this kid.  
He's still sitting on the floor, exactly how you left him. He looks concerned. "What was that all about, Dave?"  
"Oh nothing. Just my Bro congradulating me."  
"For what?"  
"This." you kiss him on the cheek again.  
"Dave-"  
You reach your arms around him again, this time roughly grabbing him and pulling him in tightly, kissing and kissing and kissing and oh this is delightful.  
His eyes widen at first, but as you go, he slowly starts to get more into it. He lets out a few small quiet moans. You are so satisfied by these noises oh god yes this is hot. Egbert is practically melting under you this is exactly what you needed yes this is what you've always needed. You shove him to the floor, still making out with him. He squeaks in surprise, then you slide your hands up his shirt and he lets out a long moan. Mmm, that sound was absoloutely delightful. You keep him pinned down, kissing him.  
His eyes are closed now and you can tell he's frightened and delighted at the same time.  
More of those adorable noises jegus you think you're in heaven.

\----> Be Dad.

You are Dad Egbert and you are currently on your way to go see how your son is doing with the Striders.  
You assume they're probably having a good time playing some sort of video game.  
However, you are curious (and slightly concerned) about this 'Bro' character, and you want to meet him. You aren't as worried as you should be, considering that John is under the care of a suspicious sounding 20-something year-old man that you've never met.   
The taxi is just pulling up next to the apartment.  
You walk up the stairs and over to the building. You know what number is theirs, so you proceed and knock on the door.  
No one answers. You can hear muffled noises from inside. You try knocking again. Still no one. You hear a thump. You knock once more, but nobody comes to the door. You hear a squeal followed by a moan in a voice that sounds similar to John's. Now genuinely concerned, you try the handle. It's not locked.  
You push the door open. You hear some more strange noises to your left and look over, only to find your son pinned down on the floor by his friend, who is kissing him. The noises are John, softly moaning and panting with much delight as his friend works his way into his mouth. You are absoloutely speechless. You are relieved to see that they are fully clothed, but you can see that Dave's hands are inside of John's shirt.   
You see John notice you. He's just as shocked as you are. "Uhh... H-hey, Dad..." his face is red and he looks really ashamed. "W-what are you doing here?" 

\----> Be John.

You are John Egbert.  
Your dad has just walked in on you and Dave making out on the floor.  
"M-mr. Egbert i-I can explain..." Dave quickly sits up, getting off of you.  
You sit up too.  
"No. No, no, no, no, no." he says, shaking his head. "No explaining nessacary. I came here to check on John, say hello, and to meet your guardian, but instead I find this." he gestures towards you. "This is not what I was expecting at all. I trusted you, Dave. You're a very nice young man. But what in the hell do you think you're doing to my son?"  
"Dad, no, it's not like that..." you try to explain. "This is my fault. I w-"  
"No, John don't blame yourself." Dave sighs. "Mr. Egbert, John had nothing to do with this."  
"Dave no, it's not your fault-"  
"No, it obviously is and you know it."  
"Yeah, but I was enjoying it and encouraging it..."  
"Is your brother aware of what you two were doing?" Dad interrupts.  
"Yeah, he told us it was okay." Dave says.  
"Oh really?" Dad sounds skeptical.  
Then, as if on cue, Dirk walks out of his room. "Hey, what's with all the yelling out h-" he cuts off upon noticing your Dad. He blinks a few times. "Oh hello. You must be Mr. Egbert."  
"Hello." Dad looks at him and raises an eyebrow. "And you must be Dave's guardian."  
He nods, extending a hand. "Pleasure to meet you. The name's Dirk."  
Dad takes his hand and shakes it. "Yes, hello Dirk. Are you aware of what these two were doing?" he gestures towards you and Dave.  
"What?" Dirk turns around and looks at you. "Oh, of course! Aren't you just so proud of them? That's my boy." he winks at Dave.  
"Proud?" Dad sounds bewildered. "What reason would I have to be proud? I told John to behave himself, which is clearly not what he's doing. Instead I find him engaging in such profound tomfoolery."  
"Actually, Mr. Egbert, like I keep saying. John is being perfectly well behaved." Dave pipes up. "I was just being stupid and naughty. I'm sorry."  
"Lil' man," Dirk leans in and whispers to Dave. "Don't be sorry. That was a fucking smooth move." he stands back up and turns to face your Dad. "And of course you have a reason to be proud! John had his first kiss. Aren't you even the slightest bit happy for them?"  
You look up at your dad. He looks back at you dissaprovingly. You frown.  
"If he had of told me that him and Dave were..." he struggles to find a word. "together... Maybe, I would've tolerated this. But I can't have my son misbehaving."  
There's nothing wrong with kissing is there? You don't think there is. Apparently your Dad thinks otherwise.  
"Son, you're coming with me." he grabs your hand and drags you out the door. "Wait here while I discuss something with Dave's 'guardian'."  
"Dad-" you start, but he closes the door on you. You sit down. Now you probably have to stay in some stupid hotel with your Dad, instead of staying with your best bro/boyfriend-thing.   
You take the time to think about what was even happening with you and Dave. So first, he kissed you, then confessed his undying love for you, then you kissed a lot, and then he pinned you to the floor and made out with you.  
You thought it was very sweet in a really strange way. Like, Dave loves you! You think you would be enjoying it a lot more if your Dad hadn't've been there...  
It's been a while since your Dad went in there. You put your ear to the door.  
"It's not acceptable! I won't have anything like this!" your Dad is getting angry at Dave's Bro.  
"Mr. Egbert, calm down. There's nothing wrong with homosexuality."  
"That's not my main issue here. I don't want my son doing stuff like that with anyone without my knowledge."  
"Shh... I said calm down, Mr. Egbert." Dirk is trying to convince Dad. "I know you don't like this, but don't you think it'd be better for both of them if you could just, y'know let their young love thrive..." they get too quiet. You strain to hear.  
They talk quietly for a really really long time. You get tired of trying to listen. You sit there outside of Dave's appartment for what feels like forever.   
You eventually decide to put your ear to the door again. "-understand? I know, it might be difficult for you, but you're going to have to abstain." it's your Dad.  
"Yes." you hear Dave say. "I wasn't even planning on sexing up John. I am a virgin, you know."  
You take your ear off the door. You sort of don't want to hear the rest of that conversation.  
You sit back down and wait for Dad to come and get you.  
The door opens and your Dad extends a hand and pulls you up. "I was going to take you with me, but Dirk convinced me that I was being irrational." he sighs. "I suppose you can stay with Dave."  
"Really?" you smile hopefully.  
"On one condition." Dad says. "The two of you need to keep it appropiate. Do you understand? Or do I need to get into this conversation again?"  
"I understand." You nod. "Thank you." you hug him. "To be honest," you lower your voice to a whisper. "I was actually frightened when Dave kissed me. I've had a crush on him for a long time, but I'm not even ready for anything inappropriate. That was overwhelming for me. So don't you worry, Dad. I won't dissapoint you this time."  
Dad smiles. "I trust you, son. Now you remember to have fun, okay?"  
He pats your back then lets go of you "But not too much fun." he winks teasingly. "Love you, John."  
You roll your eyes. "Bye Dad."  
He waves and heads back to his hotel.

\----> Be Dave.

You are now Dave Strider.  
You have just witnessed a very long discussion about your relationship with John. It ended with John's Dad lecturing you about not trying anything funny on John again. You can tell that you already have a really bad reputation with him.  
He gave you a whole lecture on underage and non-con and some other stuff, even though you told him multiple times that you are a virgin.  
He says that his innocent son doesn't need to be tainted by such things.     
Well, John is a pretty innocent kid. It was his first kiss, (it was yours too, but no one needs to know that) and he seemed to be pretty scared when you pinned him. But you weren't actually planning on doing THAT kind of thing jesus fucking christ.  
John is still outside talking to his dad, so you take this time to pester Rose.

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 12:59  
TG: rose   
TT: Yes?  
TG: i told egbert the truth   
TG: and youll never guess what happened  
TT: What did happen?  
TG: so john was embarrassed at first  
TG: and then i kissed him again  
TG: and he was really shocked  
TG: but then i told him that i like him  
TG: then he told me that he likes me too  
TG: and then i pinned him to the floor and made out with his face  
TT: Oh. Good on you, Strider.  
TT: Sounds like you two are having loads of fun.  
TG: oh you bet we were  
TG: but then johns dad came in  
TT: That sounds like it must've been disasterous.  
TT: What happened then?  
TG: first he got kind of angry  
TG: then he vented about how what we were doing isnt appropriate.  
TG: cause when he walked in  
TG: i had john against the floor  
TG: and i guess thats not very appropriate  
TG: but anyways then he lectured me  
TG: im on pretty bad terms with him  
TG: and now he finally decided to let john stay with me for the rest of the week  
TT: Wow. That sounds like you would've been scared.  
TT: What did John's dad tell you in his lecture?  
TG: dont even get me started.  
TG: he talked on and on  
TG: mostly about how i shouldnt taint his innocent son with my dirty behavior or something  
TG: even though i told him so many times that i was only kissing john its not like i was going to like rape him or some shit  
TG: bottom line he hates me  
TT: Ah. So did you discover whether or not John is an excellent kisser?   
TG: yes  
TG: he is the best  
TG: i was in heaven  
TG: he has big dorky teeth that get in the way but theyre cute  
TG: and he makes these little moaning sounds and theyre absoloutely delicious  
TG: he p much melted under me  
TG: he became an adorkable ball of moans and cute lil noises  
TT: Wow.     
TG: which is basically what was happening when his dad came in  
TT: Oh my. That's not good.  
TG: but hes still letting john stay so its all good  
TG: (so i can do it again later)  
TT: Today certainly is your day, isn't it?  
TG: yeah  
TG: well johns coming inside soon so im gonna go  
TT: Alright. You two have a very nice day.  
TG: we will  
turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 1:06

\----> Be John.  
   
You are now John Egbert.   
Your Dad has finished talking to you, so you reenter the Strider household.  
"John!" Dave perks up and dramatically reaches his arms out to you.  
You roll your eyes and meet him with a  tender brohug. "You're such a dork, Dave."  
He shrugs. "I know." he lets you go. "So, what do you wanna do now? Go for a walk or somethin'?"  
"I'd rather just sit and watch movies."   
"Okay." Dave says. "That's chill."  
"And maybe we could cuddle..." you whisper.  
Dave smiles and kisses your nose. "We can make out too, right?"    
"Yeah..." You blush, noticing that Dave's Bro is still in the room. You look over at him.  
He smiles. "I'll leave you two kids alone. But if you want to be actually alone, you should go into Dave's room."  
Dave nods. "Yeah." he picks you up bridal style and carries you into his room.  
You expect him to put you down, but instead he just leans down and kisses your forehead.   
"I've wanted this all to happen for such a long time." he says. He quickly corrects himself. "No that sounds creepy I have to stop doing that."  
"It's okay, Dave."   
"No, it's just creepy. I'm just gonna shut up now."  
You giggle as Dave sets you down on his bed. He sits down on the edge of the bed, leaving you laying down across it, behind him.  
"Daaaave~" you say, reaching for him.  
He smiles, shaking his head.  
"Come over here, you."   
"Okay...." He turns around, and crawls on top of you.  
He leans in, kisses you once, then pulls back. "I love you a lot, John. It's not just like a little brocrush. I love you. I don't ever want to leave you."  
You reach up, wrapping your arms around his neck. "I love you too."  
You smile as he leans back in, filling that gap you've longed to be filled for so long.  
This time he's more gentle, softly kissing your lips. It's a lot more within your comfort zone, so you're glad that Dave's not trying to put his tongue in your mouth, or his hands in your shirt.   
The two of you spend the rest of the day in Dave's room watching movies, kissing and cuddling.


	5. Marriage? John, no that's gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cheesy shit

You are Dave Strider and it's been about 4 days since your little run-in with Mr. Egbert.  
You and John basically spend the next few days visiting places around Texas, kissing, playing video games, watching shitty movies, talking and just generally being around each other.  
He is excellent. Truly excellent. You never want him to leave you ever. You're not even sure how you lived with only being his Internet friend.

\-----> Be John

You are John.  
You have just finished eating supper on your 5th day together with Dave.    
The two of you are having one spectacular fucking time until you come to the realisation: 5TH. DAY.  
Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no...  
You are only visiting here for a week, meaning you are leaving in two days. What are you going to do at home without Dave?  
"Dave." you say.  
"Hm?" he takes anoter sip of his apple juice. "What is it?"  
"D-Dave I just realised something."  
"What?"  
"I have to go home in two days...."  
Dave's eyes widen. He sits there without a word for a few minutes. When he finally processes what you just said, he speaks. "W... N-no that's- really? No- wha..." he gasps. "John..."  
You frown and nod.  
He reaches over and gives you a hug. "You can't leave... No that's... That's not okay. I won't have you gone. I..." you swear he's going to start crying.  
You wrap your arms around his neck. "Dave shh. It'll be fine..."  
"No it won't... I'm going to turn into a sappy emotional wreck Egbert."  
You kiss his cheek to try to make him smile. "I know... Just don't cry, okay?"  
"Okay... I just..."  
"Shhhh...." you run your fingers through his hair. "Sh."  
His face lightens up a bit, and you smile. "I love you."  
"I love you more, Egbert." he is smiling now and he pulls you closer.

Eventually he lets go of you. "I can't believe you're leavin' so soon... This whole time has just breezed by..."  
"I know. I can't believe it either. But I guess there isn't much we can do about it though... I mean, plane tickets are expensive, and I already have a flight back schedualed."  
"I know... We just have to make the most of today and tomorrow, I guess." he says. Although his words were optimistic, his tone of voice just made him sound outright depressed. "But, I just can't imagine being without you.... What was it all even like before you came here? I know that sounded cheesy but it's true..."  
"I know." you try to confort him, but you really aren't any good. "Like you said, we just have to make the most of it until I have to leave."  
Dave's mouth suddenly curves into a twisted smirk. "Unless..." he starts. There's a mischevious glint in his eyes.  
"Unless?" you raise an eyebrow.  
"Unless," he repeats. "I can go back with you on the plane."  
"What? No. I mean, I wish, but my dad would never allow that."  
"Dude." he seems intent on convincing you. "Hmm. How big is your suitcase?"  
"Dude really? Not big enough to fit you that's for sure." you pause, thinking about how going home would be without Dave. "Well... There has to be some way we can get you to come back with me."  
"There does....." he looks as if he's thinking hard about it.  
You think too. There has to be a way, but there isn't one.  
You frown.  
"Maybe you can stay here. Maybe your dad will find someone else to come back on the plane with him."  
"I don't know. I doubt it'll ever happen."  
"Maybe.... Maybe we could take me back and then leave your dad here."  
"No. We need an actually good idea." You shake your head. "Wait! I've got it! I think this might work.... But it's kind of a dumb idea."  
"What is it?"  
"We have to get married."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay I know it's short but c'mon I've waited long enough to give you this chapter so here it is (excpect another one soon)


	6. 5 years, Maybe 4 if we're lucky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More cheesy stuff but here you go, you beautiful people.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short continuation of chapter 5

"Wait dude are you serious?" Dave looks at you questioningly.  
You nod.   
"Married?"  
"Yes. Because then we can move out and live together, and we don't have to worry about being separated. You do want to marry me, right?"  
"John, I...." he blinks a few times, looking at you over his shades. "D-does this count as a proposal?"  
"Uhh." you blush, unsure of whether or not this IS a proposal. Hastily deciding, you get on one knee and take Dave's hand in yours. "Yes."  
His face lights up and his cheeks turn a pale red.  
"Dave.... W-will you marry me?"

\-----> Be Dave.

You are now the Strider and you are being proposed to holy fucking shit oF COURSE YOU WANT TO MARRY JOHN  
"Yes." you say. "Yes! Yesyesyes!!" you pull John up and hug him tightly. You don't even care that you're probably not even old enough to get legally married. You keep him held close.  
"John." you say softly by his ear.  
"Yes?" he murmurs back, still keeping the embrace.  
"Aren't we a bit young to get married? Like, legally."  
"Oh, uh..." he frowns. "Wow I never thought about that... I guess that doesn't matter though because even if I go home now, one day we'll still get married."  
"Yeah." you close your eyes, imagining being married to John. It'd be a dream come true.   
"Even if it takes a long time, this way we know we'll get to see each other again." John says optimistically.  
"I know."   
"But it could be years... I don't want to wait years, Dave. I wish we could get married now-"  
You cut him off with a kiss.  
When you pull away, he blushes. "Ehh, sorry-"  
"My pleasure~" you put your shades up on your head and go in for another, longer, more passionate kiss.  
John closes his eyes and goes along with you. He makes soft noises mm gee you could get used to this.  
As he breaks away for air, you keep your arms wrapped around him.  
You let your mind wander.  
You can't believe that John proposed to you though like jegus fuck. You never excpected this to happen for a long time. Years, even. And you were expecting to be the one proposing. Egbert really caught you off guard in a really cute and romantic way.   
He just wants to be with you. Spend time with you. Get married to you.

John stays in your arms for a while, until he suddenly pulls away, a sudden look of urgent concern on his face.  
"What's wrong?" you ask.  
"Isn't gay marriage illegal in Texas?" he says.  
Then you remember that it is.  
Your eyes widen. "I..."  
That just means that you can't get married in Texas. Doesn't Washington allow gay marriages? You pray that it does.  
"Washington state." You say as calmly as possible.  
His eyes light up. "Dave, you're a genius! I guess we can get married there."  
"Dude, we're only 13. We can't even possibly get married for 5 years. Maybe 4, if we're lucky."  
"I guess you're right. I shouldn't even be thinking about this."  
"Yeah." You run your hand through his hair, then let go of him. "We don't have much time, so do you want to go to that beach i was talking about?"  
"Yeah!" John smiles brightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow sorry guys this chapter sucked.  
> Sorry oh my god chapters 1-5 were good what happened.  
> I'm sorry but I promise chapter 7 will be good I promise okay I'll make it good


	7. Last Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sweet Cheesy and Hella Gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank my sister for the description

Your name is Dad Egbert and you are getting a ride to the airport from Dirk Strider. You're flying back home today and you can tell that your son is upset about it.   
Partially because he had to wake up at 4am, but mostly because he has to leave his boyfriend here in Texas.   
You sit in the passenger seat, while John and Dave sit in the back.  
No one says a word until you get to the airport. As Dave helps John grab his bags, he kisses him on the nose and John flashes a small smile.   
You've grown to accept their relationship after your conversation with Dirk and Dave that one day.  
Dave makes your son happier than anything, and you want him to be happy. 

\-----> Be Dave.

You are Dave Strider and you can't believe that John is going home.   
You don't want him to leave, but you understand why he has to. You understand that you can't make him stay with you now.  
But you know that you're going to be a lonely trainwreck without him.  
The two of you spent the last two days taking a million pictures on both of your cameras and both of your phones.   
Your Bro even took pictures of you and John making out. The fucking stalker.  
You figure you'll be grateful for the pictures at some point though.  
So now your phone, camera and computer are full of dumb selfies, stalker pictures and cute pictures of you and John.  
Also the two of you gave eachother your snapchats and skypes and phone numbers.  
You'll always have pesterchum, but sometimes you might want to see or hear eachother.  
You sit in Bro's car, next to John.  
It's 5:30 in the morning and you can't think of anything but how it'll all be without John.   
You lean over and, without a word, kiss him on the cheek.   
He turns his head and kisses you on the lips. You lean in further to hold him but your seatbelt locks.  
"Fuckin'..." you mutter under your breath. John giggles.  
"Dave no cursing." Bro says sarcastically.  
You roll your eyes, unclick your seat belt and reach out to John.  
"Dave put it back on." Bro says.  
"No!" you sit on John's lap.  
"Dave that's not legal. Don't wanna run in with the cops again, do we?"  
"Ugh, fine." you quickly kiss John on the neck and whisper "I love you, the cops can go fuck themselves." before going back and buckling your seatbelt.  
John giggles again. "I love you too, Dave." he reaches across and grabs your hand.  
You look over at John's Dad, who is regarding all of this with a raised eyebrow and a questioning look. He notices you looking at him and smiles.

\-----> Be Dad.

You are Dad Egbert.  
"Hi Dave." you greet politely. "How are you this morning?"  
"Tired. Slightly depressed. How about you, Mr. Egbert?" he replies.  
"I'm alright. And please, don't be so polite, Dave. You can call me Dad."  
You see Dave's light up with the strangest expression of surprise and happiness. "Okay, 'Dad.'" he smiles at the words that just escaped his lips. He looks over at John with an enthousiastic smile. You've never seen so much expression on him, ever.  
John smiles back at him.

\-----> Be John.

You are John Egbert and Dave is smiling the biggest smile ever.  
You've never seen this much expression on Dave ever and it's really nice. You wish he'd smile genuinley more often. He's looking at you. He's smiling wide enough to show teeth.  
You wish that you were close enough to congradulate him on his new status. Your Dad just told Dave to call him "Dad."   
Meaning that he finally accepts Dave as your boyfriend and as PART OF THE FAMILY.  
You can tell Dave is also wishing he was close enough to hug you.  
You talk with Dave for the rest of the ride, until you get to the airport.

\----> Be Dave (again)

You are now Dave Strider and you are finally free of that restricting seatbelt.  
As soon as the car stops you and John step out. You hug him. You don't want him to leave, but he has to. You kiss him on the lips.  
He doesn't want to leave, but he knows he has to.  
"I guess this is goodbye...."  
"We probably won't see eachother again in person for a long time.... But.... It's guranteed that we'll meet up again in the future, and stay together for good." you say, trying to stay calm and not cry.  
He nods, hugging you tightly. "No, Dave, I don't want to think about that... I just..." he sighs. "We'll see eachother again, for sure, okay?"  
"Okay...."  
He picks up his bags, and his Dad (no, just 'DAD') beckons for him to go inside. He gives you a supportive look. You know he's sorry for making John go home.  
You kiss John goodbye. It's a passionate kiss. It lasts for a while, but it's not long enough.  
He pulls away after a while and gives you a sad look, but you grab him by the collar and kiss him again, this time more roughly. You press your lips against his, and you feel your self start to cry. You can taste the salt from the tears streaming down your face as you kiss him.   
John gently pushes your face away from his, but stays with his arms wrapped around you.  
"Dave, shhh." he says quietly. "It'll be okay." he paps you on the back. "Shh. Don't cry."  
You try to hold back the tears, but end up blubbering and crying on his shoulder. You finally stop crying when John takes you by the mouth. He puts his lips on yours and the two of you make out. You can sense the jugemental stare from Dad Egbert, and the small smirk from Bro.  
But you don't care because you're safe and calm here in John's arms.  
When John finally breaks the kisses, he whispers "Dave it's okay."  
You smile, and he lets go of you, not before planting a kiss on the top of your head.  
Dad says that he needs to hurry now. He ruffles your hair and waves at Bro.  
He then takes his son's hand and begins to walk away.   
John turns around and waves. "Bye Dave!" He blows a kiss, then turns around and walks away.  
You smile faintly at the gesture.  
You turn around to face Bro.  
He gives you a sad smile. "It's okay, kid." he pats you on the shoulder.  
You get in his car without a word.  
You last pretty much the whole way home without saying a thing.  
Your face is still wet from the tears and you still wish you were in John's arms.  
Eventually your head clears up, and you decide to speak up again.  
"So, Bro?"  
"Yes?" he replies.  
"What's for dinner tonight?"  
"I don't know. Pizza?"  
"Cool."  
Bro raises an eyebrow, but keeps his eyes on the road.  
"So you trying to get your mind off of your little finacé, or what?"  
"Uh, sort of."  
"Okay. You miss him already, don't you?"  
"Don't remind me...."  
"It's okay." he chuckles. "Just as long as you somehow manage to keep him in love with you for like 5 years, it's all good."  
"I might get to visit him before 5 years is up...."  
"Lil' dude, what I'm saying is: long distance relationships are hard as fuck."  
You sigh. "I don't want them to be."  
"Just keep him hooked and he'll still be into you."  
"Okay."  
You stay silent for the rest of the ride.  
When you get back home, you go into your room. You flop down on your bed and practically fall asleep right away.

\------>

When you wake up from your nap, you see your computer flashing. You sit up and see what it is.  
It's John.  
He's pestering you.  
How fucking long did you sleep!?

ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 2:47  
EB: dave! i just got home  
EB: where are you?   
EB: answer meeeeeeee!!  
EB: dave dave dave dave  
TG: john  
EB: dave :D !!!!  
TG: yo  
EB: hey  
TG: sup  
EB: nothing much,  
EB: just telling you that i'm home  
EB: where were you?  
TG: ah sleepin i think  
EB: oh.  
TG: yeah  
EB: uh  
EB: okay.  
TG: i was tired okay egbert dont judge me  
TG: i know youre judging me  
TG: but i still love you  
EB: dave you dork :B  
TG: yeah yeah call me what you like  
TG: but youre still the bigger dork  
EB: whatever you say  
TG: ok  
EB: but guess what i got in the air port!  
TG: what did you get  
EB: sunglasses!  
EB: am i cool now dave?  
TG: probably not  
EB: fuck you

You smile fondly.  
You can't wait to get married to this kid.  
In five years. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I'm sorry it ended like this....  
> But there will be a sequel so chill out kids.


End file.
